The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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