You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
