sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I met the friendliest cop last night
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
