Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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