doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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