OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Two words: nipple clamps
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