I'm lost and stupid without you.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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