Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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