im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
The ass gains better be worth it
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