So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
that's an acceptable place to lick
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
