that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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