what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
