If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
