if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
