Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize