yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
