the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
