If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
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