I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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