i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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