At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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