Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Randomize
