He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
