called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
