so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
