okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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