His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
