I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
