You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
