I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
North Korea, Best Korea!
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Randomize
