I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
