Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
