Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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