I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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