i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
