Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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