But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
