OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
