can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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