my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
