you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
