he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
