He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
