they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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