I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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