we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
