Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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