I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
