I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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