And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
